Saturday, 10 October 2015

Does Radio 1's Tim Westwood have a vaginal fixation?

Last night hip hop DJ and Radio 1 presenter Tim Westwood played in Suede nightclub, Longworth St Manchester.

Some love him, some hate him. Some disregard him as a middle-class white son of a bishop from Norwich, or as some kind of wigga clown. Whatever your opinion, he's been at the forefront of the UK hip hop scene since the 80s. I first stumbled across his rap show in 1996 and was equally perplexed and fascinated. What is that accent? He sounds white. Is he white? How has he got to where he is? Regardless of these questions, the biggest rap stars poured onto his show week in week out. I heard him interview Snoop Dogg back when he was Snoop Doggy Dogg. Wu Tang Clan (including now deceased Ol' Dirty Bastard) took over his Friday night show. Other stars followed as hip hop became more mainstream at the turn of the century. I've been a fan since then, and I've wanted to come to his shows for a while.

Last night, though, his popularity was confirmed: the 58-year-old took to the decks of Suede, which must have reached capacity. Before long, he began discussing the vaginas of the female customers. Well, why not?

It's time to go and give a shout-out to the girls with the tightest pussy,” he claimed. “If your pussy's tight and clean, scream!”

There were a handful of affirmative responses.

Westwood stopped the record. “That white girl didn't scream,” he claimed, pointing to the dancefloor. “That's because she put her drawers on back to front and her pum pum smells of doo doo.”

He then busts out Vybez Kartel's Romping Shop, which- if I'm interpreting correctly- is about a brothel.

This was not a sole occurrence. He discussed such matters a number of times throughout the night, at one point asking us to “point to the person you want to fuck.” I thought I'd been teleported to Magaluf at one point.

I must be getting old- a lot of the music I didn't recognise, and didn't rate compared to 2000-era hip-hop. On a few occasions I seemed to be the only person who didn't know the song at all, let alone blast out the lyrics. I'm not massively bothered by the language, but I can see why it's not everyone's cup of tea.

Pics from the night will be here.

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